Hello…

I was a melacholic mummy today, I hate the first day back at school/nursery 🙁

from textfixer.com

So I wrote the below and had a wee cry, and then looked forward to all the little tales I would get from my youngest when I picked him up from nursery before lunch.  He always hugs me better and reminds me that the big bad world has people in it who can look after my boys and make them smile before letting me have them back.

I was lucky in that hubby was working from home to ease me into the routines, so I was afforded a longer time to recover my composure after my writing session, before having to brave the chill of this lovely, sunny, winter’s day!

Cinnamon   Humility   Belong   Burglary   Speed   Tiger   Early   Gymnast   Computer

Sitting in my son’s room

Lyrics from a song I used to know

Playing in my head

At the sight of ‘cinnamon’.

This parenting lark

Is a lesson in humility:

The ultimate feeling that you belong

To someone small, but

The world is always waiting

To commit a chilling burglary

(As you watch them flourish

At breakneck speed).

Born in the year of the tiger,

My gorgeous six year old –

His scribbled sums on the window

Proud beside his brother’s “snakes”.

The stories they both told

As they shared a stool to reach,

Sheilding their eyes from the winter sun;

Literally yesterday, but already memory.

Yes, my gorgeous big boy

(Still with those amazing blue eyes

But, alas, without his curls)

I miss him now he’s given up to school.

I encountered his spirit

Before I ever really saw his face:

The 14-week flutterings of my

Determined early gymnast.

As I scribble in this notebook

At a pace that he aspires to

I wish I could hold his baby self again;

Maybe do it better than before.

But I often wish this –

Smelling his hair as I hold him

Or watching old videos of him

Wanting to rescue him from the computer –

He is himself because

I was myself:  imperfect,

Loving, unsure, determined, afraid –

And FIERCELY proud of him.

First set

Second set

So, yeah *sniff* glad to have gotten today out of the way and that it’s nearly the weekend…there were extra cuddles tonight!

Reading the poem back, there are too many words repeated etc, but the bare bones of the sentiment are there and my boys liked listening to it.  As it is 40 lines long, it took me 17 minutes instead of 15 to write it (slapped wrist for me), but I had momentum so wanted to finish it in one sitting and then reach for the handkies 😉

You, dear reader, would almost definitely have gone a completely different way with these words; what images did they conjure for you?

To the comments we go!

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